Everybody worries – a picture book for children who are worried about Coronavirus

Here is a lovely book for children who may feel they are the only ones who are worried.

You can download the book here  https://en.calameo.com/read/000777721945cfe5bb9cc?authid=Xu9pcOzU3TQx

Remember if you have concerns that your children are not coping you can arrange to talk to a Family Support Worker by phoning the Donegal Parent Support line on FREEPHONE 1800 112277

Do you need to talk to someone? Donegal Parent Support Line launching on Thursday 14 May

A new free Parent Support Line will be available to parents in Donegal from Thursday 14 May. The Donegal Parent Support line is being co-ordinated by the Donegal Family Resource Centre Network in association with a wide range of community and voluntary organisations involved in family support. The service will be available from Monday to Friday 9am – 3pm.

Many parents are feeling stressed and need a listening ear at this time. There are extra pressures with home schooling, working from home, anxiety about Coronavirus and a sense of uncertainty about what the coming months will bring. Parents are encouraged to avail of the opportunity to talk through those issues which are causing them stress. The Donegal Parent Support line will offer this, with a range of experienced and specialised family support and youth workers available to call parents back. The service will offer sign-posting, advice and the opportunity to talk through whatever is causing a parent stress – no matter how small the issue may seem.

Here is an interview with Leona from the Mevagh Family Resource Centre and Martin from the Moville and District Family Resource Centre on the Greg Hughes show on Highland radio today about the new service https://soundcloud.com/onegalarentline/donegal-parent-support-line-highland-radio-13-5-2020-greg-hughes-show

This initiative has been developed in partnership with the Tusla Prevention Partnership and Family Support team in Donegal as part of the ongoing strategy to develop and fund early intervention community supports and initiatives for families in the county.

The number for the new Donegal Parent Support Line is 1800 112277 and the service will operate Monday to Friday 9am – 3pm – phonecalls to the number are free.

 

Helping the introvert child to flourish

Having everyone at home full-time could be challenging for our introverted children. Here is a good piece from the Center for Parenting Education which helps us understand what it is to be introverted and how we can connect with our introverted child.

Two Different Ways of Being

Sarah and John, seven year old twins, are just home from a school trip. Sarah, excited to tell her mother about her adventure, rattles off the details of her day and enthusiastically exclaims that she had “the best day ever!”

John, on the other hand, stands in the background, does not share anything about the outing, and quietly goes into the kitchen to get a snack.

This scenario may be all too common in some households. What is happening here? Did John not enjoy the trip or is something else going on?

Part of the answer might lie in understanding the differences between introversion and extroversion.

  • Introverts get their energy by focusing inside themselves and need alone time to recharge themselves.
  • Extroverts, on the flip side, seek stimulation outside themselves and prefer to be with others to get their energy.

John, being more of an introvert, may have preferred some time to regroup before sharing the highlights or lowlights of his day.

The Research and How to Help

Research has shown that 75% of individuals are categorized as extroverts. More often than not, their qualities are valued more than those of introverts. Consequently, extroverts like Sarah receive more positive reinforcement from those around them.

Introverts like John may often feel out of place, and as a result may need to develop extra coping skills to help them feel good about who they are.

Parents and educators can play an important role in helping children embrace their inner selves. Since introverts tend to need time to process their experiences and do not readily talk about what they are thinking, the adults in their lives may need to reach beyond the surface to discover their many hidden gifts.

Research indicates that there is a strong biological basis for where people fall on the introversion – extroversion continuum. So while you may find ways to neutralize the more extreme positions on either end of the spectrum, you will not be able to change your child from an introvert to an extrovert or vice versa. It is hard-wired.

Introversion vs. Extroversion

There are significant behavioral differences that distinguish how introverts versus extroverts respond to the world.

  • Introverts prefer internal thinking as a way to cope with the world. Extroverts focus on their social connections and actions as an approach to dealing with life.
  • Introverts can be overwhelmed by sights and sounds and tend to narrow their experiences, but go deeply into those areas they have chosen to focus on. Extroverts tend to be less sensitive and can take in a broader range of input.

Introverted Children

Introverted children typically:

  • Communicate best one-on-one
  • Are strong listeners
  • Seek solitude for renewal
  • Need time to ponder questions before answering
  • Often prefer not to share their emotions
  • Have high self-awareness
  • Learn well through observation
  • Are quiet in large social settings
  • Prefer to watch a game or activity before joining
  • Concentrate deeply
  • See inner reflection as very important
  • Select activities carefully and thoughtfully

Introverted Children, Play and the Art of Creativity

Reaching introverted children can be as simple as adding opportunities for creative expression throughout the day. This is a great way to encourage and build on their area of natural strength: being innovative. It can be an incredibly positive experience when children are exposed to many forms of art, music, science, literature, and various physical activities.

However, since introverted children are very sensitive to people, places, and things around them, it is important to not exceed their threshold for outside stimulation. Provide time for them to process each experience before moving on to the next one.

Creative people in many fields are introverts because they are comfortable spending time alone; solitude is a crucial ingredient for innovation. Embrace creativity and reach for the stars.

Daily activities to enhance your children’s imagination

  • Suggest they read something new and unfamiliar, such as a book on a new topic or new genre.
  • Ask the question “what else?” often.
  • Have them come up with five new uses for familiar objects.
  • Play creative word games and puzzles.
  • Fill creation box with everyday items to use as art supplies.
  • Instead of buying a new game, have them make one.

Success at Home with Introverted Children

Supporting introverted children at home may be challenging at times, especially if you are an extrovert.

  • Typically, they see their room as a safe haven. Allowing a private space for them should be at the top of the list.
  • Build quiet time into their day so they can recharge their batteries, especially if your household is loud and filled with many activities.
  • Share with your children your own personality needs as a parent. It can be that you are an extrovert parenting an introverted child. Share the uniqueness and positive attributes of both approaches.

Courage in the Face of Adversity

Introverted children may be a little more on the sensitive side and not always open to sharing their struggles.

  • You can help your child realize that hardship and bumps in the road are part of life.
  • Practice patience and understanding when your child does not make the best choice.
  • You can face the music together. Introverted children make good use of “me too” or “I’ve been there” stories, if they are told with a “we’re in this together” attitude.

Social Matters

Introverts typically experience more intimate connections and tend to have fewer close friends than extroverts.

Contrary to conventional wisdom, introverts are not always shy. They do not necessarily experience social anxiety as some shy children do. Usually, they have good social skills and enjoy people – just in smaller doses and smaller groups, such as one or two people.

Introverted children need their parents to accept their preferences and communicate to them that there are different types of people – some who enjoy being in large crowds and some who do not. Either way, it is okay.

Parents can gently encourage introverted children to go a little beyond their comfort zone in social matters. For example,

by teaching them how to manage crowds and other highly-stimulating situations.

by carefully selecting the number of activities you do, limiting the length of your stay, and building in down time between events.

Introverts may benefit from assistance in recognizing when they need a break. For example,

You can help them find words they can use to excuse themselves from a group, find a quiet spot in the midst of a busy mall to decompress, and develop strategies to re-enter without generating undo attention.

Delight in a Slow Pace

For the sake of your introverted children, and for your own good, slow down. Children can’t think or talk unless they feel they can enter a pressure-free zone. A relaxed, patient pace is just one wonderful goal to have when raising introverts. A rushed and tense atmosphere will drain the oxygen right out of them.

Slowing down will allow your children to bring more of their world to you. Since they are so attuned to their perceptions, they can come up with astonishing insights and perspectives that are really humorous and creative. Let their more observant nature teach you to “stop and smell the roses.”

In Summary

Awareness and support can be half the battle in educating and protecting introverted children. Parents can help their children accept themselves by talking to them about how they react to the world. Let them know that there is incredible value in being an introvert, as well as in being an extrovert.
Finding empathy and understanding in one’s family, developing useful strategies for making it through a full day, and gaining knowledge of why individuals do what they do will help your introverted child be more comfortable in an extroverted world.

By Nina Gallegos, Certified Parenting Educator

You can find more articles and resources from the Center for Parenting Education here https://centerforparentingeducation.org/

Substance use and mental health during Covid19

Here is some excellent advice and information from Jigsaw about alcohol and substance abuse. The original is available at this link https://jigsawonline.ie/young-people/substance-use-and-mental-health-during-covid-19/?utm_source=CM&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=Updates_7 and you can find lots of good advice, information and support on their website here https://www.jigsaw.ie/

Substance use and mental health during Covid19

Covid-19 has highlighted how our actions impact ourselves and the people around us. It’s helpful to consider how the use of alcohol and drugs can influence and impact our ability to cope with this situation.   

Life was tough enough, and Covid-19 can make everything seem harder. Faced with challenging circumstances, alcohol and drugs can seem like a way to cope. We may feel they will help us escape the uncertainty of this pandemic.

Both the Covid-19 situation and substances can impact mental health, so inform yourself as much as possible to make the right decisions for you.

Reasons for using substances during Covid-19

  • Covid-19 has created a lot of uncertainty in our lives that many of us find difficult to sit with. Getting high or drunk can feel like a way to escape this.
  • Anxiety naturally produces a fight, flight, or freeze response that can make us feel uncomfortable both in our bodies and with our thoughts. Alcohol or drugs can seem like a reasonable response to help calm this.
  • Media stories have shown how anxiety has led to panic buying. This is likely because it help us to feel more in control to focus on the problems that we can fix. This type of impulsive response to the situation can also be seen with substance use.
  • With the limited social contact and outlets, as well as increased hours indoors, it simply might seem like there’s nothing else to do.

Using intoxicants while alone may actually increase the likelihood of over doing it

The impact

You may already be aware of the links between alcohol and mental health. However, hangovers have the potential to make the anxiety and low mood that many are already experiencing from Covid-19, worse.

With the prospect of extended social isolation, we might think “sure it makes no difference, I’ll have one more.” Using intoxicants while alone may actually increase the likelihood of over doing it. Without friends to provide support or supervise, the chances of risky behaviours increases. This could include going against the HSE Covid-19 guidelines, or driving under the influence.

Starting an unhealthy cycle

Substance use can lead to feelings of shame, guilt or denial. With the current Covid-19 circumstances, we may be left alone to deal with these heavy emotions. You may feel trapped, and in an effort to manage these unwanted feelings, use more substances. This starts a cycle of unhealthy substance use which can be difficult to break.

The more you use any substance to help you cope, the more likely you are to start turning to that substance ahead of other coping strategies. The longer alcohol or drugs are used, the more tolerance we build, meaning we need to take more of the substance to feel the same effects. There is also the chance of developing an addiction, when we need to take the substance to “feel OK” or get on with the day.

Which needs are met through substance use and can these needs be met in other ways?

What is your relationship with substances?

Reflect on your relationship with the substances you’re using. Think about why you take them. Is it to feel temporary relief? Do you believe it helps you feel more comfortable in social situations? Is to alleviate boredom? Or does taking substances help cope with the feelings created by the Covid-19 pandemic?

None of these are unusual relationships with substances. But think about is which needs are met through substance use. Can these needs be met in other ways? For example:

  • If you want relief, could talking with friends, doing exercise or art help?
  • If you feel anxious socially, can you use apps like houseparty or jackbox to hang out with friends through a common game?
  • If you’re bored, what activities or interests can you add to your routine?
  • If you’re feeling stressed, what coping skills have you used before that have helped with this feeling?

Fortunately, there are ways to cope with the stress of this situation which don’t involve substances.

Harm reduction

Any substance that can have a negative impact on your mental health and may also compromise your physical health. If you are going to drink or use substances during Covid-19 pandemic, consider using a harm-reduction approach. This includes practical strategies and ideas aimed at reducing negative consequences associated with substance use. Examples of harm reduction are:

  • Eat before taking substances
  • Don’t “bulk buy” alcohol or drugs to limit intake
  • Only use substances in a safe environment
  • Clean and disinfect drug paraphernalia before each use
  • Do not use substances if taking care of someone else
  • Alternate alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks.

If you feel that substance use is creating difficulties for you, the HSE Drugs and Alcohol Helpline provides support and information. Their number is 1800 459 459.

If you would like some extra support at this time, you can Ask Jigsaw or sign up for one of our group chats

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Supporting young people to stay positive and motivated – a Jigsaw webinar

Supporting young people to stay positive and motivated

This has been reproduced from the Jigsaw website and the original is available here https://jigsawonline.ie/parents-and-guardians/webinar-supporting-young-people-to-stay-positive-and-motivated/?utm_source=CM&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=Updates_7

 

We ran a webinar for parents on Monday, 27 April where two Jigsaw clinicians gave a presentation on supporting young people to stay positive and motivated. They then took questions from parents about what was going on for them.

The lockdown has gone on longer than any of us could have foreseen at the beginning and is now what people are calling the ‘new normal’. However, it can still feel far from normal particularly with things like school, college and work suspended, uncertain or over in some cases.

Keeping yourself and the young people in your life positive and motivated right now can take a bit of of extra work. Hopefully, this webinar covers useful tips for you to try at this time.

Jigsaw offers online group chat for young people to support their mental health

Jigsaw provides on line group chat opportunities facilitated by Jigsaw clinicians for young people aged between 12 – 25 living in Ireland. You can get more information about them and sign up here https://jigsawonline.ie/young-people/live-group-chats/?utm_source=CM&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=Updates_7

Here is a timetable of which topics are covered during the week and at which times:

Monday at 12 pm: Managing Isolation and Loneliness

Monday at 4 pm: Support for Exam Stress

Tuesday at 11 am: Dealing with Family Conflict

Tuesday at 2 pm: Managing Anxiety

Wednesday at 12 pm: Coping with Feeling low

Wednesday at 4 pm: Managing Isolation and Loneliness

Thursday at 11 am: Support for Exam Stress

Thursday at 2 pm: Dealing with Family Conflict

Friday at 12 pm: Coping with Feeling Low

Friday at 2 pm: Managing Anxiety

If you know a young person who needs support in any of these areas and would like to take part in the group chat facilitated by a Jigsaw clinician please contact Jigsaw at the link above

Find more information, advice and support on https://www.jigsaw.ie/

Let’s Play – what about screen time?

Published: 24 April 2020

From: Department of Children and Youth Affairs

Screen time during the emergency

Here’s what the International Play Association has to say on the subject of screen time:

Most families want to find a reasonable balance between time spent on screens and time for other types of play and activities, including family time.

If you have access to screens at home during the COVID-19 (Coronavirus) pandemic, they can be a great way for your child to:

  • keep in touch with friends, school, social groups and family
  • share experiences, concerns and ideas
  • have a laugh and enjoy themselves
  • get absorbed in a game that takes their full attention
  • take part in creative activities
  • access information, news and advice

It’s understandable to relax some of the usual rules in the current crisis. But spending all day on screens can have negative effects, as well as providing your child with important opportunities and experiences.

For example, your child may find it difficult to get to sleep, or they may miss out on other activities.

Some ways to help your child find a healthy balance:

  • show you understand and are interested. Let them know you understand that playing on screens isn’t all good or bad. You could try playing some of their games, or get them to teach you about apps they like
  • keep moving. Encourage your child to take regular breaks, rather than sitting still or lying down for too long. They can walk around, and do star jumps or press-ups to increase their heart rate
  • get outside. If possible, encourage them to get some outside exercise
  • look out of the window. It’s good for your child’s eyes to change focus by looking at the horizon or distant buildings
  • try keeping your mealtimes screen-free. You’ll have time to talk and appreciate your food
  • try to avoid screens before bedtime. This will make it easier to fall asleep, and to get up in the morning
  • plan together. Discuss with your child how long they feel it’s ok to use screens each day. Get them to make a plan, and ask what would help them stick to it
  • remember. Older children might enjoy doing things they did when they were younger or playing with favourite old toys. This can give them a sense of reassurance and security

Some advice for grown-ups:

  • try to avoid repeatedly checking updates on the COVID-19 (Coronavirus) pandemic. Try making a conscious decision to turn off or mute notifications. And try only checking the news a couple of times a day

Babies and very young children

Babies can be attracted to screens. This is especially true if people around them are using screens. But the most important things babies and very young children need for their development don’t come from screens. They are about human contact and family members talking, cuddling, singing and playing with them. Below is the WHO’s recommendation for babies and very young children:

Recommendations at a glance:

Infants (less than 1 year) should:

  • Be physically active several times a day in a variety of ways, particularly through interactive floor-based play; more is better. For those not yet mobile, this includes at least 30 minutes in prone position (tummy time) spread throughout the day while awake.
  • Not be restrained for more than 1 hour at a time (e.g. prams/strollers, high chairs, or strapped on a caregiver’s back). Screen time is not recommended. When sedentary, engaging in reading and storytelling with a caregiver is encouraged.
  • Have 14–17h (0–3 months of age) or 12–16h (4–11 months of age) of good quality sleep, including naps.

Children 1-2 years of age should:

  • Spend at least 180 minutes in a variety of types of physical activities at any intensity, including moderate-to-vigorous-intensity physical activity, spread throughout the day; more is better.
  • Not be restrained for more than 1 hour at a time (e.g., prams/strollers, high chairs, or strapped on a caregiver’s back) or sit for extended periods of time. For 1-year-olds, sedentary screen time (such as watching TV or videos, playing computer games) is not recommended. For those aged 2 years, sedentary screen time should be no more than 1 hour; less is better. When sedentary, engaging in reading and storytelling with a caregiver is encouraged.
  • Have 11-14 hours of good quality sleep, including naps, with regular sleep and wake-up times.

Children 3-4 years of age should:

  • Spend at least 180 minutes in a variety of types of physical activities at any intensity, of which at least 60 minutes is moderate- to vigorous intensity physical activity, spread throughout the day; more is better.
  • Not be restrained for more than 1 hour at a time (e.g., prams/strollers) or sit for extended periods of time. Sedentary screen time should be no more than 1 hour; less is better. When sedentary, engaging in reading and storytelling with a caregiver is encouraged.
  • Have 10–13h of good quality sleep, which may include a nap, with regular sleep and wake-up times.

You can find out more about the importance of play at the Let’s Play Ireland website  https://www.gov.ie/en/campaigns/lets-play-ireland/

Let’s Play – Ideas for Families

Let’s Play – Ideas for Families

Published: 24 April 2020
From: Department of Children and Youth Affairs

While there are lots of ideas around for different age groups, here are some ideas that the whole family can enjoy together:

  • have a movie night, choose a movie together and add some popcorn
  • play a game of chess, dominoes, jacks or card games
  • try a board game – they can be great fun!
  • how about a dance mat or playing a game on the Wii
  • ping pong, air hockey, tennis, darts, pool or snooker
  • have a pamper night with facemasks, foot soaks and hand massages
  • if you have a ‘gamer’ in the house – play together. Teens find it hilarious to see how bad their parents are at gaming!
  • go outside – play some football, frisbee, dodgeball, piggy in the middle or stuck in the mud or go for a walk at night (within 2km of your home). You’ll be amazed at what fun can be had!
  • share some of your old traditional games – kerbsie, two ball, kick-the-can, skipping
  • have a picnic, cook a meal together, or plan a BBQ. Sleep outside!

You can find out more about play on the Let’s Play Ireland website  https://www.gov.ie/en/campaigns/lets-play-ireland/

Barnardos provide new Covid19 Crisis Parent Support Line

  Barnardos has launched a national telephone support service for parents in response to the challenges they are facing during the Covid-19 pandemic. This service will be staffed by Barnardos project workers who are trained professionals.

The government’s response to Covid-19 has meant that normal routines and sources of support are currently unavailable to many families.

Through their dedicated telephone support service Barnardos staff can provide support and advice to parents on the following issues:

  • How to talk to your children about the corona virus
  • Setting a good routine
  • Managing children’s behaviours and sibling dynamics
  • Managing aggression and family discord
  • Home schooling/managing school expectations.
  • Fostering natural learning opportunities in the home
  • Healthy eating
  • Accessing fun and educational activities for families and individual children
  • Managing your child’s worries
  • Self-care for parents
  • Helping parents manage their own worries and anxieties
  • Managing children’s online activity
Barnardos also provides specialist services and support in relation to bereavementadoption and fostering.

For more information and to request a call-back from Barnardos click the link Barnardos National Parent Support Phone Service